Miss Manners: I think it’s hurtful to ban children from weddings. Our pediatrician agrees.

DEAR MISS MANNERS A limited of my cousins have gotten married of late and they requested that no children attend their weddings aside from the ones performing the roles of ring bearer and flower girl Related Articles Miss Manners My grandson calls this woman Nonna and I m not OK with that Miss Manners I d been growing my hair out and the barber blithely chopped it off Miss Manners Is it narcissistic to display a studio portrait of oneself in the home Miss Manners I was criticized for holding the elevator for a woman in the hall Miss Manners My child was a bad friend and I don t know how to approach the other mom This request would have been thoroughly foreign when I was growing up I have uncovered the situation awkward especially for family weddings since my children are just as much members of the family as I am My husband and I have attended two such family weddings so far During one reception one of my aunts with her adult daughters present at the table with us innocently requested us if it was nice to be there without the kids I responded honestly that I did not like it and that it was weird that they were excluded Our oldest is old enough to be fully aware that he s being excluded and he feels left out My youngest is young enough that she wouldn t require a meal at the reception Most of of our children are old enough not to be disruptive Our pediatrician thinks this is a bad practice On a personal level I don t understand the motivation I have invariably enjoyed children at weddings and felt that my own wedding would have been missing something if there weren t children on the dance floor Not to mention the fact that they are people too who have feelings that can be hurt I am very curious to hear your thoughts about whether or not it is appropriate from an etiquette perspective to host a wedding with no children invited as a blanket rule Also how should a family like mine with multiple children respond GENTLE READER It is equally perplexing to Miss Manners why children would be unwelcome at a family wedding She finds them mostly charming and their imperfections make a sweet addition to the occasion Plus they usually make for a good story or two However there are particular for whom the chance of a child ruining their special day is too great a hazard Never mind that this kind of me first attitude mimics the very childish behavior that they are trying to avoid It is certainly inconvenient for families but as long as the ban is equitable Miss Manners does not object on the grounds of etiquette Related Articles Dear Abby Because of what was mentioned in the group text my sister ditched half our family Asking Eric Why should a grandmother have to let the kids interrupt Harriette Cole My neighbor s bossiness about parking has gotten out of hand Miss Manners My grandson calls this woman Nonna and I m not OK with that Dear Abby I picked my baby s name and now I m informed a hypothetical child has dibs That your pediatrician has an opinion on it however is concerning Perhaps it would be best not to share with the medical expert your children s social interactions on the playground or in their dating lives later on DEAR MISS MANNERS Is it better manners to subtly inform your colleague they have something in their teeth prior to seeing clients Or is it better manners for everyone to not say anything GENTLE READER If the spinach were in your teeth which would you choose Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website www missmanners com to her email gentlereader missmanners com or through postal mail to Miss Manners Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO